Breaking Generational Cycles – Overcoming Patterns That No Longer Serve You
One thing that has bothered me more and more as I’ve grown older is hearing people say, “That’s just how someone is,” or “It’s always been done this way.” That mindset has kept too many people stuck in cycles that do not serve them. The truth is, we have the power to break patterns and shift the direction of our lives.
Personally, I don’t call anything a generational curse. I believe it’s all about how we choose to see things. What we believe is what we will get. God gives us choices. Out of comfort, we often default to what we’ve grown up with—but that doesn’t mean we’re cursed. It means we’re choosing what feels familiar. We’re choosing to fall in line with what’s been labeled as “normal.”
Choosing to stand out and do something different can be uncomfortable and even lonely at times. But remember this: God didn’t call us to fit in—He chose us to stand out.
As we grow, we gain new experiences and see different ways of doing things. Just because something has always been done one way doesn’t mean it has to stay that way. If your family has never owned a home, struggled financially, battled addiction, or didn’t complete school—that does not have to be your story.
We do not have to wear generational patterns like a badge of honor and use the excuse, “This is just how it is.”
Not too long ago, I fell in love with the book of Exodus, and one verse completely shifted my mindset:
Exodus 20:5 – "You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me.”
Here’s how I understood that: "…the third and fourth generation of those who hate me.” We are far beyond the 3rd or 4th generation, and as far as I know, my elders didn’t hate God. In fact, my first experience with faith came from my grandmother, Nana. And let’s not forget—our ancestors prayed and sought the Lord deeply during slavery. That’s not hate. That’s faith, endurance, and hope.
So no, I’m not suffering from a generational curse. I’m living out generational choices—and so are many of you.
Did you know this same verse shows up again in Deuteronomy 5:9? That repetition isn’t coincidence—it’s a reminder. We are not bound by the past. We are free to choose differently.
You and I—we are the cycle breakers. The ones called to rise, to shift, to grow, and to lead a new path for those coming behind us.
Sometimes that means finding your tribe. And you will. Trust me, our Papa doesn’t leave us—but He will remove distractions so we can focus on Him. And yes, sometimes those distractions are people we love.
Choose you. Choose healing. Choose freedom.
Closing Prayer
Father God, thank You for the strength to see truth and break free from patterns that no longer serve us. Thank You for reminding us that we are not bound by our past or the choices of generations before us. Give us the courage to stand out, the wisdom to choose differently, and the faith to walk the path You have laid before us. May we lead lives that reflect Your love, freedom, and purpose. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
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